Freezer frozen shut - Any Ideas?

Dynamite, lots and lots of dynamite!

Dynamite should not be necessary, det cord would do it. 

It's a thin, flexible plastic tube usually filled with pentaerythritol tetranitrate (PETN, pentrite). With the PETN exploding at a rate of approximately 6400 m/s, any common length of detonation cord appears to explode instantaneously.

Works really well!

You are "pulling" and not "pushing" the doors right? 

Unplug it. Push outside in the sun.  Wait a couple of days. Anything inside will make a good crab bait. Re-stock with fresh crabs.

Seems like there’s an obvious solution here for an attorney bruh.  Send the refrigerator a strongly worded letter demanding that it honor its claims of frostless operation or prepare for legal actions.  When it does not comply and tells you to F off, post your dismay on the intranet. 

 

How many lawyers does it take to open a freezer door?

How many lawyers does it take to open a freezer door?

Depends on the charges and what court?

How many lawyers does it take to open a freezer door?

Depends on how much money is involved

Pneumatic chisel and the jaws of life.  The only way to do it.

OK now wth w deez suggstions 

Spose i gotsa unplugger n let dis bish melloooooow undr UV 

OK now wth w deez suggstions 

Spose i gotsa unplugger n let dis bish melloooooow undr UV 

drink lots of beer and piss around the gasket 

Salt dissolves ice right?

Pour some soy sauce around the perimeter of the rubber seal 

That's some McGuyversan shit right there! 

And, surround the base of machine with sticky rice!

Bushy

Drop it in a large container of boiling water.

Spray bottle of rubbing alcohol 

OK now wth w deez suggstions 

Spose i gotsa unplugger n let dis bish melloooooow undr UV 

shout a bunch of nonsense at it then pound on it demanding the truth.

Love this forum.
You never know which direction your topic could go. lol