FUNNY STUFF......

FISHERMEN CATCH THE DARNDEST THINGS

In August, 2007, a 13 year old boy fishing near the Dutch city of Zierikzee made the biggest and strangest catch of his young life - a scuba diver.

Wim van Huffeln had been swimming close to shore when he felt something pierce his lip. He was expertly hooked by the boy. No word on whether the young angler has resumed surf-fishing.

from www.incrediblefishingstories.com

For the Scifi Fans! 

And Part II:

Naoaki??

http://www.youtube.com/v/8ZsML4uWoiw&color1=0xb1b1b1&color2=0xcfcfcf&feature=player_embedded&fs=1

I got out of breath just watching this guy.

 

http://www.snotr.com/video/2630
this baby girls a good talker

http://www.snotr.com/video/2630
this baby girls a good talker

How did you get my Wife's baby video?

How about this one...

The Smiths were unable to conceive children and decided to use a surrogate father to start their family. On the day the proxy father was to arrive, Mr. Smith kissed his wife good-bye and said, 'Well, I'm off now. The man should be here soon.'

Half an hour later, just by chance, a door-to-door baby photographer happened to ring the doorbell, hoping to make a sale. 'Good morning, Ma'am,' he said, I have come to...'

'Oh, no need to explain,' Mrs. Smith cut in, embarrassed, 'I've been expecting you.'

'Have you really?' said the photographer. 'Well, that's good. Did you know babies are my specialty?'

'Well, that's what my husband and I had hoped. Please come in and have a seat.'

After a moment she asked, blushing, 'Well, where do we start?'

'Leave everything to me. I usually try two in the bathtub, one on the couch, and perhaps a couple on the bed. And sometimes the living room floor is fun. You can really spread out there.'

'Bathtub, living room floor? No wonder it didn't work out for Harry and me!'

'Well, Ma'am, none of us can guarantee a good one every time. But if we try several different positions and I shoot from six or seven angles, I'm sure you'll be pleased with the results.'

'My, that's a lot!', gasped Mrs. Smith.

'Ma'am, in my line of work a man has to take his time. I'd love to be In and out in five minutes, but I'm sure you'd be disappointed with that.'

'Don't I know it,' said Mrs. Smith quietly.

The photographer opened his briefcase and pulled out a portfolio of his baby pictures. 'This was done on the top of a bus,' he said.

'Oh, my word!' Mrs. Smith exclaimed, grasping at her throat.

'And these twins turned out exceptionally well -- when you consider their mother was so difficult to work with.'

'She was difficult?' asked Mrs. Smith.

'Yes, I'm afraid so. I finally had to take her to the park to get the job done right. People were crowding around four and five deep to get a good look'

'Four and five deep?' said Mrs. Smith, her eyes wide with amazement.

'Yes,' the photographer replied. 'And for more than three hours, too. The mother was constantly squealing and yelling - I could hardly concentrate, and when darkness approached I had to rush my shots. Finally, when the squirrels began nibbling on my equipment, I just had to pack it all in.'

Mrs. Smith leaned forward. 'Do you mean they actually chewed on your, uh...equipment?'

'It's true, Ma'am, yes. Well, if you're ready, I'll setup my tripod and we can get to work right away.'

'Tripod?'

'Oh yes, Ma'am. I need to use a tripod to rest my Canon on. It's much too big to be held in the hand very long.'

I saw this in Vacaville...

How to read Craigslist BOAT ads

Fisherman's special
Piece of sh*t. Dusty, stinky, old fish guts/blood all over.

Duck Hunter’s special
Piece of sh*t. Smells. Possibly of carcasses.

Classic/vintage
Funky piece of sh*t. nothing on board have worked for decades.

Email for pictures
Ugly piece of sh*t.

Suitable for living in
Lice-ridden piece of sh*t. Doesn’t run.

Needs TLC
Piece of sh*t that needs lots of work, best to be taken to junkyard.

Custom interior
Non-standard components. Sub-par work. Parts replaced with non marine material so it'll rust out quickly. Totally screwed up.

Take over payments
I got screwed on my financing and now I am going to try to do the same to you.

Boat for rent by private owner
Boat not properly maintained. One system guaranteed to fail during your rental. Say good-bye to your security deposit.

ALL CAPS
I AM A COMPLETE IDIOT.