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2017 AOTY/DOTY Entry

Topic: FUNNY STUFF......  (Read 265186 times)

reelmccoy and 1 Guest are viewing this topic.

mooch

  • 2006 Angler of the Year
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 :smt003
« Last Edit: September 15, 2006, 10:58:43 AM by Mooch »


mooch

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when in trouble....try to blend in  :smt003


Seabreeze

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Fishing & Reading

A couple go on vacation to a fishing resort in northern California. The husband likes to fish at the crack of dawn. The wife likes to read.

One morning the husband returns after several hours of fishing and decides to take a nap. Although not familiar with the waters, the wife decides to take the kayak out. She paddles out a short distance, and continues to read her book.

Along comes a warden in his boat. He pulls up alongside the woman and says, "Good morning Ma'am. What are you doing?"

"Reading a book," she replies, (thinking "isn't that obvious?)"

"You're in a restricted fishing area," he informs her.

"I'm sorry officer, but I'm not fishing, I'm reading."

"Yes, but you have all the equipment. So I'll have to take you in and write you up."

"If you do that, I'll have to charge you with sexual assault," says the woman.

"But I haven't even touched you," says the policeman.

"That's true, but you have all the equipment."

MORAL: Never argue with a woman who reads. It's likely she can also think.

Note: Smart Women Fish and Read
Saltwater is the cure for everything that ails us,
sweat, tear or the sea.


mooch

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 :smt118


ZeeHawk

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Hey Mooch, the bathroom pic is hilarious! where did you get it? Or better yet, where is that bathroom??? It's sure to pick your spirits up and build un-needed confidence! I'm sure ever man walk out of there with his shoulders back, chest out, and a "How you doin" ready to the nearest lady. :tongue3: :wave: :smt110 :beat :smt083 :smt054 :toothy9:


mooch

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glad you liked it - this pic was just passed on to me by a co-worker  :smt001


mickfish

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 :smt003
Group IQ is inversely proportional to the size of the group.

A Steelhead always knows where he is going, but a Man seldom does.


mooch

  • 2006 Angler of the Year
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> > FIVE RULES FOR MEN TO FOLLOW TO ACHIEVE A HAPPY LIFE:
> >
> > 1. It's important to have a woman who helps at home, who cooks from
> > time to time, cleans and has a job.
> >
> > 2. It's important to have a woman who can make you laugh.
> >
> > 3. It's important to have a woman who you can trust and who doesn't lie
>to
> > you.
> >
> > 4. It's important to have a woman who is good in bed and who likes to
> > be with you.
> >
> > 5. It's very, very important that these four women do not know each
>other.


Bushy

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My  Favorite was a Gary Larson cartoon, Far Side:

Two men fishing in a rowboat. Huge mushroom cloud on the horizon. One says to the other, "You know what this means, don't you? Forget the size restrictions and screw the limit!"

I cut it out of the newspaper and keep it to this day.

Allen




SANTA CRUZ KAYAK FISHING Guide Service since 2004
Kayak Fishing Magazine
NCKA
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The Lets Go Fishing Radio Show
Santa Cruz Sentinel
Monterey Herald


mickfish

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Tequila Christmas Cake
 
 
Ingredients:
1 cup of water
1 tsp baking soda
1 cup of sugar
1 tsp salt
1 cup of brown sugar
Lemon juice
4 large eggs
Nuts
1 bottle tequila
2 cups of dried fruit
 
 
Sample the tequila to check quality.  Take a large bowl, check the tequila again.  To be sure it is of the highest quality, pour one level cup and drink.  Repeat.  Turn on the electric mixer.  Beat one cup of
butter in a large fluffy bowl.  Add one teaspoon of sugar.  Beat again.  At this point it's best to make sure the tequila is still OK.  Try another cup... just in case.  Turn off the mixerer thingy.  Break 2 leggs and
add to the bowl and chuck in the cup of dried fruit.  Pick the frigging fruit up off floor.  Mix on the turner. If the fried druit gets stuck in the beaterers just pry it loose with a drewscriver.  Sample the tequila
to check for tonsisticity.  Next, sift two cups of salt.  Or something.  Check the tequila.  Now shift the lemon juice and strain your nuts.  Add one table.  Add a spoon of sugar, or somefink.  Whatever you can find.
Greash the oven.  Turn the cake tin 360 degrees and try not to fall over.  Don't forget to beat off the turner.  Finally, throw the bowl through the window.  Finish the tequila and wipe counter with the cat.
   :tongue2: CHERRY MISTMAS!
Group IQ is inversely proportional to the size of the group.

A Steelhead always knows where he is going, but a Man seldom does.


Usagi

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A seasonal cartoon...
You don't quit playing because you get old, you get old because you quit playing...


JTF..

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for all you serial internet message boardies... happy holidays jtf..
2008 Elk Fiesta Survivor
2007 1st Place Elk Fiesta
2006 3rd Place Paddlefest Shark Derby
2006 Elk Fiesta Survivor
2005 Elk Fiesta 14th place
Mooch is OG


mickfish

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Ha Ha
Group IQ is inversely proportional to the size of the group.

A Steelhead always knows where he is going, but a Man seldom does.


granitedive

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You guys are killin' me!
"It's the ocean flowing in our veins"


Tote

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Oh oh! I just woke up the GF laughing at the Tequila Xmas Cake.
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